A guy goes to the doctor to get checked out.
Halfway through, the doctor leans back and shakes his head.
“What’s that mean?” The guy says, “Is there something wrong with me?”
The doctor replies, “Well, I’m afraid to tell you, but all the signs say that Mercury is in Uranus right now.”
The guy smirks and waves his hand, “Doc, I don’t believe in any of that astronomy bull crap. I don’t read the horoscopes… Just give it to me straight.”
The doc looks up. “I don’t believe in any of that crap either. What I’m trying to tell you, is that my thermometer just broke in your ass.”